In the addiction field, anyone, and I mean anyone, can construct an addiction theory. Dozens and dozens have been crafted over the years. They cover an assortment of ideas as to why addiction happens and the treatments for it. They come in book form, magazine article form, workshop form, or simply chatting with our colleagues form.

Likewise, anyone can make a claim (theory) about a client’s behavior, accounting for why clients behave as they do. Addiction counselors incessantly make such claims. For those who savor this sort of theorizing, they often spew out a notion and then hold their heads high, with folded arms on their chest, feeling a sprig of pride with their theoretical “accomplishment.”

Many counselors do this without a moment’s pause, without a moment’s reflection without a scrap of evidence.

Yet, there remains one little fly in the soup for these kinds of theorizing. Do the theories represent true progress in our field?

If they did, then it stand to reason that all this “theorizing” should have made a remarkable difference in our work. We then should be more advanced, more successful in our outcomes than we presently are. Yet, treatment wise we don’t quite seem to be that successful or advanced yet.

My point is that true progress in our field does not come from mere theorizing. It comes from clever ways to test a theory. If a theory withstands the heat of a rigorous test, and it does so time and again, then we can claim progress.

So, for all the authors, workshop presenters, and clinical staff out there who adore theorizing, it’s time to put your theory to the test. If you elect not to do this, be aware that your theory could be wrong. Why? because you choose not to test your idea.

And for those rest of us, who read these mere theories or listen to them, we an obligation to ask the author, presenter or colleague a three-word question.

Where’s your evidence?

Time And Recovery

One of the things that people in recovery from an addiction
often have is a mental timetable of when things have gone wrong. They can often
trace back to the first times that their addiction started to cause problems in
their life, their career or their relationships. This negative timeline keeps
playing over and over, creating a sense that everything in one’s life is
negative, destructive and dysfunctional. This often extends to events in the
future that are overshadowed or destroyed because of things that have happened
in the past.

Opening up to the future is difficult for addicts. The
future can seem to be a scary place full of pitfalls and traps that will pull
you back into the continuing negative timeline. In my book, “The Law of
Sobriety” I talk about the time that is needed to stay positive to allow
the universe to respond in kind. You cannot expect that immediately everything
you need will flow to you.  It will take
time, consistent work and a forward and constructive journey to get to where
you know you want to be.

One of the most important aspects of the timing of positives
in your life is to avoid becoming discouraged when things don’t happen
immediately. You need to open up to positives in all forms, not just the giant
goals that you have for your future. If your goal is to be clean and sober,
starting every day with seeing yourself sober for that day is an essential
positive first step. Take the time to do this exercise each morning. Think of
it as a deposit to your positive energy bank. When the time is right the
universe will repay you in ways you never imagined possible.  The key is to stay focused and understand
that you cannot control this future timeline, but that it is moving you in the
positive, constructive direction that you need to go.

Many people that don’t feel a strong sense of connection to the world around them turn to ways to escape into a reality where they feel they do have a connection. This can be a very powerful escape mechanism that often doesn’t look like the addiction that it is. In my book the Law of Sobriety I focus on how alcohol and drug addictions can ruin lives, but in reality the computer can be just as problematic. Making a change from spending hours on the computer to connecting to real people in the world around may be the best New Years resolution if you find yourself in this addiction trap.

People may turn to a variety of aspects of the internet and the computer to escape from the negativity of the world they are currently experiencing. This may include internet porn, spending hours and hours on social media websites or becoming a constant player in 3D and role playing games that allow players to create a powerful persona that is just the person we want to be.

While this may seem like a healthy escape it is absolutely devastating. People that rely on these online simulations and games become more isolated and alone in the real world. What needs to happen is all the energy that is going into creating that perfect online persona needs to go into envisioning yourself being successful in the real world. You need to see yourself in social settings, meeting new people, building that relationship you seek and interacting in your community. By opening up all the possibilities of these types of real and positive relationships in your mind you are prepared when the opportunities arise. When you are off the computer and in the real world you will find that the person you want to be is right there inside of you; not just in some virtual world on your computer.