I’m returning to the scene of the crime (the city I grew up in), New York City, to speak to fellow psychologists, and I’m inviting you to join me!
Why? Because as women we all have girly thoughts, and together we can learn to identify them as well as strategize ways to eliminate them.
I promise this will be a fun-filled presentation! “Leading From Within—Breaking Free of Girly Thoughts and Embracing Your Inner Business Woman” is based on my ninth book, my third for women: The Girly Thoughts 10-Day Detox Plan.
Giving it a Name: Girly Thoughts
Having a name for and strategies to eliminate the devastating process by which women internalize negative messages in society about how we should look and act is so important if we are to stop fighting ourselves and be successful.
When we listen to this bombardment of negativity, we form a toxic self-talk. Turning against ourselves is a destructive, time-consuming, and exhausting inner process that hampers so many of us professionally, from psychologists to executives to single, working moms.
Girly Thoughts: An Intergenerational Legacy
Recently, I was encouraging a college student to apply for a position even though she didn’t quite meet all the requirements. She resisted.
Curious. But not new.
Some of you will remember your mothers or grandmothers speaking about separate ads for men’s and women’s jobs, with the more interesting positions being reserved for men.
Research shows that men will apply for a position when they have as little as 60 percent of the listed requirements. But some of you may have a personal experience of not applying for a position unless you met all the qualifications.
I believe our reluctance to be assertive professionally is a legacy born from being raised to be the “good girl” who tries not to appear aggressive and thus “unfeminine.”
Does this hamper your inner businesswoman? Yes.
What to do? Join Me
5.17.15: Noon to 4:oo p.m., AperiTivo, 780 Third Ave, New York, NY
Sponsored by the New York State’s Psychological Association, Division of Women’s Issues
Online registration is available until 5.15.15: http://www.nyspa.org/event/DOWI_05-17-15
Breaking Free Can Be Fun
Learning to identify your girly thoughts and break free from them can be a hilarious and empowering journey. Follow me through my gradual re-definition of what it means to be a psychologist, through publishing nine books with four publishers, speaking at professional and corporate meetings, and becoming a student of social media, all spurred by fighting my own girly thoughts, which taught me the art of self-promotion.
Together, we’ll explore how your girly thoughts:
- make you feel self-conscious and tell you not to leave the house because of how your hair looks.
- keep you stressed and eating, because so what? You’re already overweight.
- Tell you that self-promotion is not professional, and certainly not nice!
My Next Stops:
- Worchester, MA: June 11, 10:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. “Girly Thoughts and Addiction.”
- Lake Placid, NY: July 11, 3:00 p.m. to 5:00 p.m. Book signing at Bookstore Plus.
You’ll find more ideas for getting rid of your negative self-talk in my latest book, The Girly Thoughts 10-Day Detox Plan: The Resilient Woman’s Guide to Saying NO to Negative Self-Talk and YES to Personal Power
Patricia A. O'Gorman, Ph.D., is a psychologist in private practice. She is noted for her work on women, trauma, and substance abuse and for her warm, inspiring, and amusing presentations that make complex issues accessible and even fun. She has served as a consultant to organizations across the country in preventative and clinical strategic planning. Dr. O'Gorman is a cofounder of the National Association for Children of Alcoholics, and she has held positions ranging from director of a rape crisis center to clinical director of a child welfare agency, and director of the division of prevention for the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA). She is a veteran of numerous television appearances, including Good Morning America, Today, and AM Sunday and is the author of eight books including: The Girly Thoughts 10 Day Detox Plan (2014), The Resilient Woman: Mastering the 7 Steps to Personal Power (2013), and Healing Trauma Through Self-Parenting (2012) 12 Steps to Self-Parenting.